Are you a victim of emotional blackmail? Learn to detect it here
Emotional blackmail is a way of communicating that is more common than we think and more difficult to detect than it appears. Anyone can be an emotional blackmailer just like anyone could be blackmailed.
Find out with us about the ways in which emotional blackmail can occur and what to do about it.
It is so difficult to detect that we are under emotional blackmail, since these are mostly subtle and are intended to be invisible to the naked eye.
And in this way make the other believe that they must comply with certain activities or be in a certain specific way, even accept the same blackmail because that is a way of loving.
Warning signs
1. It makes you believe that you are to blame for making you jealous
Jealousy is insecurities that come from those who feel them, no one is responsible for the jealousy of their partner.
Typically, blackmailers will make you believe that your behavior is causing their jealousy and will make you feel guilty about your actions, friends, and outings.
Even insinuating that it is you who provokes reactions in others that may well not be happening.
2. Makes you feel guilty for having a social life independent of your partner
These types of people seek to isolate you from your social environment so that all your attention is exclusively for them. So it is common to devalue your friends or family to prevent you from meeting them.
It is also common for these people to be indifferent to your outings on the outside, but when you want to go out they tell you comments that make you feel committed or committed to staying.
3. Makes you feel like you are the only one who can be supportive
They adopt an apparently dependent, vulnerable and needy role of your care that makes you feel that you cannot leave them without being destabilized.
4. Demerit your achievements
This class of people is distressed to feel that their partner is more successful than they, since they have to be in a power relationship where they are the powerful.
So they make every effort to make their partner feel guilty that they invested time and dedication in reaching their goals, and it is not the relationship.
5. Ask that you do not leave him alone
It makes you feel burdened by him and guilty for having ideas about leaving the relationship. It makes you believe that singleness is a terrible thing that you cannot put him under, since he could not tolerate that lifestyle.
6. It makes you responsible for everything related to raising children
It is typical for emotional blackmailers to use hetero-normative gender roles to hold their partner fully responsible for the care of the children and the home.
7. Uses events from the past to justify their behaviors
He brings up situations from the past that leave him in a victim position to justify the behaviors of which they are caused. He does not genuinely recognize his mistakes and positions himself as the most affected, always justifying his behavior and minimizing your feelings.
It turns the discussions about in such a way that at the end of the day you are responsible and guilty of the facts.
How to free yourself, face and act?
Mainly you must know that it is in your control to do something and get out of this complicated situation, it has a solution, and it will make you feel full to free yourself from it.
Work on managing your emotions, be aware that it makes you feel the way you feel, recognize what your emotions are and which ones come from what the other person is doing to you.
Work with your self-esteem and your self-care, redirect your sight towards yourself and your well-being. Work on reducing the feeling of guilt that the relationship leaves you, identify what your mistakes are and improve them without recriminating yourself for them.
Seek support, you do not have to pay for this alone, surround yourself with your trusted people and specialists in mental health to work your situation in depth.