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How to talk about sex with my children?

Grecia De Flores
4 min read

It is usual for parents to worry about how and when to talk about sexuality with their children, so we bring you some details and tips to facilitate this moment.

Sexuality goes far beyond the mere sexual act, so when we refer to this we are also talking about identity, love, privacy and knowledge of the child's own body.

From very early on, children begin to ask about sexuality to try to understand how the world and their bodies work, it is important that parents make an effort not to have taboo on this topic.

How to talk about sex with my children? – Wellness and Health – WebMediums
Sex education

When and how to talk about sexuality with your children?

Children from a very young age begin to ask their parents about sexuality, among the most common questions are: How do babies come into the world? Why do boys and girls have different genitalia? What is sex.

So sexuality is a topic of conversation in the family since children are between 3 and 5 years old, in this first stage they are getting to know their body and how it is different from that of the opposite sex.

An appropriate time to introduce the conversation can be during the time of the bath, teach him the names of his genitals without giving him nicknames and inform him that this area is private, that no one can touch him except his doctor and only if he has authorization from mom or dad.

When children grow up, you can rely on a pregnancy in the family or a sexual scene on television to talk about it, be open to their doubts and if possible try not to let them know if the subject bothers you, it is normal for them to want to know these things.

They will probably have more than one conversation about it and that's fine, answer their questions clearly and thus form a bond of trust.

How to speak?

Try to be clear and punctual, do not give younger children more information than they need, they will ask at their own pace and when they understand more you can explain in more depth if necessary.

It naturalizes sexuality, it is normal, and it does not have to be a taboo, teach them what is right and wrong about sexual behaviors, but do not try to hide their existence, your children will have exploratory behaviors, we help them to know what is right or not in environments social.

Where to start?

As we said before, sexuality is complex, and it is your child who must guide how much progress they make on the subject. At first teach them about their genitals and that their privacy is essential, then they will ask how babies are made and born.

If they are smaller you can tell them that when the parents love each other very much and want to make a baby their father deposits his seed inside his mother and the baby grows inside, if they are bigger you can use the word sperm and ovum for the explanation.

It is very important to teach children how they can understand sexuality in a healthy way, that sex is only for when they are mature and adult.

That love is the most important thing for two people to be together, that two women or two men can love each other in the same way, and that's fine.

Guide them and let them know what is right and what is wrong and how to identify these situations so that if they feel uncomfortable they can share it with you.

Tips that can help

  • Try not to make fun of his doubts even if you find it funny, this will make him feel ashamed.

  • Try not to be embarrassed about it, as this can make your child understand that it is an uncomfortable topic that they should not ask about.

  • Answer clearly, do not add complex or unnecessary information.

  • It calls all parts of the body by its proper name.

  • After answering, ask him if his question was resolved, if not, explain again.

  • Be attentive to your child's reactions and responses

  • Be willing to repeat if necessary, as it will probably be necessary

Remember that it is important to help children learn about sexuality in a healthy way, teach your children values so that they themselves can recognize what is correct and thus develop positive affective relationships when they grow up.