How to earn the trust of your children
At present, it is a controversy and a concern of many parents how to gain the trust of their children. The important thing is that your children feel that confidence and feel safe to tell us things that concern them or that they can turn to us if they have a problem.
What is trust?
The word trust is security, firm hope when taking a difficult or compromised action. In other words, the security that someone has in another person or something.
That is why trust must be formed from an early age in order to achieve a bond of respect and proximity.
The priority of all parents to have a healthy relationship with their children is to work on fluid communication. It is not about being too strict or being too tolerant. It's about building trust, authority, and mutual respect.
Now, the family builds that trust from an early age, but what happens when classes start?.
When you start classes, there are problems at school, be it learning, discipline or adaptation. That is why it is essential that parents teach them to solve the problems that our children may have at school.
How do we do it?
Teaching children how to solve their problems, the knowledge and practice of emotional intelligence are very beneficial and helps them face possible and varied solutions:
1- The game of empathy: it consists in making the child aware of their actions and in what ways they affect other children.
2- Talk to them: explain all the points of view to them and make the child understand the other's point of view and thus understand the reasons that he has had to act the way he has.
3- Allow each child to present their problem and all the possible solutions.
4- Do little about the feelings that conflicts generate: once children recognize the feeling that the problem generates, they will have the necessary tools to later solve this or others.
5- Allow the children to give their opinion.
It is essential, to properly solve problems, detect and locate the interests of each of the parties involved in the problem, for this we must practice good listening, that is:
Focus on non-verbal communication.
Do not make negative judgments.
Appropriate tone of voice.
Use gestures of assent.
Avoid ordering, sending, etc.
Loa parents who overprotect their children, do things for them and try to help them always do not realize that they affect the child's self-esteem. That is why children should be left to do things alone and make mistakes.
What is self-esteem?
Self-esteem is the value or esteem we have for ourselves based on how we see ourselves or others see us.
Self-esteem is very important because it is part of who we are and shapes our personality, it also directs us towards goals and influences how we act.
How can we improve our children's self-esteem?
* Avoid using phrases such as: you are... (lazy, bad, stupid, slow); you don't have... (shame, remedy); This indicates to the child that there is no possibility of change, what, and it will be like that.
* Threats or silent treatment should not be used.
* Show love and affection to your child.
* Congratulate your child and make their compliments credible.
* Never compare your child with others and be proud.
It is important to highlight the achievements and not only punish the failures even if the good is expected, and we only want to change the bad. You always have to recognize an achievement. Make each child feel special in something, if there are siblings dedicate time separately to enhance their strengths, promoting skills and interests.
To achieve all the above, there must be a healthy family environment. That is to say, the axis of family coexistence, which teaches so much and produces so much well-being at home, is in communication: you have to agree to live together, in harmony not to hinder each other, to help each other!
How to improve the family environment?
Very easy, what we must do to improve the family environment is:
* Try to celebrate everything (birthdays, seasons of the year, etc).
* Have at least one meal a week all together without television.
* Do the whole family and without company, some activity (take a walk, go to the field, etc).
* Spend time with your children and do not miss your childhood.
* Be proud of your family.
* Play family games.
* Be gentle, polite, and affectionate with everyone.
* Do household chores in company.
If we want to have a good family environment we have to start with ourselves and start by believing in the family's trust.
What is family trust?
Family trust is a bond of belonging that has to be built. It can be said that the trust placed in others brings security and satisfaction. Trust between parents and children is essential in a successful mutual relationship.
How to earn the trust of your children?
Gaining trust in our children is one of the great challenges of the family. To earn that trust you must take into account:
Let them tell you their stuff freely, you can ask, but don't force them to.
When they tell you something, pay attention that they realize that you are doing it.
Don't judge or criticize him, just enjoy doing things with him.
Don't try to tell them what to do, just listen and advise if necessary.
Respect their privacy.
Show them that they can trust you, supporting them when they need it most.
You can ask for their opinion on important issues; If you trust him, he will trust you.
If you know how you can earn trust in your children, put it into practice. Remember to show them all the time that they can trust you.